OK, kiddo! Here are all the fantastically amazing posts tagged with Unjust laws

Malawi Gay Couple Gets Presidential Pardon

June 7th, 2010

Gay couple is pardoned and free to go, but an angry, homophobic crowd is outside the window.

After intense international pressure, the president of Malawi has pardoned a couple sentenced to jail for 14 years simply because they were gay.

Steven Monjeza and Tiwonge Chimbalang were arrested in December while celebrating their recent engagement. The two were charged with “unnatural acts” and given the maximum prison sentence by a judge just last month.

While the pardoning is generally good news, it does not change Malawi law, which still makes homosexuality a crime—and Malawi’s Minister of Gender and Children has stated that the couple will be re-arrested if they stay together. Worse still, homophobia is rampant in Malawi and the Malawian press has made the case somewhat of a hot issue.

Britain has reportedly offered asylum for the couple—a welcome bit of irony, since virtually all of Africa’s laws outlawing homosexuality are legal relics from Britain’s colonization of the continent.

Gay Malawians Sentenced For “Unnatural Acts”

May 19th, 2010

Figure 1-A: Riding a bike; An unnatural act.

Steven Monjeza and Tiwonge Chimbalanga, a gay couple in their twenties have been found guilty of “unnatural acts” in a Malawian court yesterday. The two were arrested in late December while celebrating their recent engagement with a party. Now that the verdict has been delivered, they could face a prison term of up to 14 years.

The court ruling was was delivered in a building made of highly unnatural concrete, lit unnaturally by glass tubes coated with unnatural phosphoric powder, excited by billions and billions of electrons carried through an unnatural system of wires. The court verdict was recorded into a computer, which interestingly enough, was natural, having been picked that morning from a computer tree.

Homosexuality, incidentally, has been observed in hundreds upon hundreds of species in the most unnatural environment of all: Nature.

Civil Marriage Commissioner Bill Goes To Court

May 14th, 2010

My religion is clear: Thou shalt be a total dorkwad.

A discriminatory bill that would allow civil marriage commissioners to refuse their public services to gay couples went before the Saskatchewan Court of Appeal yesterday. The bill was, strangely enough, brought to court by the government that’s ultimately trying to introduce it in an attempt to predetermine its constitutionality.

I’m certainly no lawyer, but the fact that the provincial government even has to consult the courts shows what a constitutionally shaky bit of nonsense this is. I mean, I can’t imagine how allowing people to refuse public services based on personally held beliefs can mesh with Canada’s Charter of Rights. Civil marriage commissioners provide non-religious ceremonies for couples that do not wish to be married by a priest in a church. If these commissioners interpret their personal religious texts in a way that forbids them from serving a segment of the public in a professional capacity—and that’s a pretty big stretch, if you ask me—then they’ve chosen a career forbidden by their faith and had better choose another.

Personally, I have a feeling that we have nothing to worry about, but if my intuition is wrong and the court rules in favour of the bill, then I have a ton of questions. In addition to gays, could civil marriage commissioners refuse to marry an inter-faith couple? How about a couple who has a child out of wedlock? Does this incredible trump card apply to other careers? Could a vegetarian working at a provincial registry refuse to file paperwork for hunting licenses? What about a pharmacist who’s a Scientologist refusing to fill prescriptions for anti-depressants? Can a doctor who’s a Jehovah’s witness refuse to perform blood transfusions?

And if those questions are too hypothetical at this point, how about a thick-headed premier who’s an Annelidaterian forcing all Saskatonians to open a massive can of writhing, slimy earthworms?

I guess we’ll find out soon!

California To Strike Down Gay “Cure” Law

April 7th, 2010

Gay researchers can finally stop.

California is advancing a bill that will repeal a bizarre “gay cure” law from 1950. The law states that “the State Department of Mental Health shall plan, conduct and cause to be conducted scientific research into the causes and cures of sexual deviation, including [...] the causes and cures of homosexuality.”

A bill to strike the ancient law advanced on a 4-0 vote, with three abstentions from members who supported the removal of the homosexuality reference, but would still like the law on the books to research sexual predators.

No word on whether or not the state will next stop its investigations of crop failures due to witchcraft.

Oklahoma Passes Bill Discriminating Against Wrong Group

March 31st, 2010

Too many prejudices to track.

The U.S. State of Oklahoma has accidentally passed a bill that eliminates all hate crime protections from people based on their race or religion instead of their sexual orientation, the bill’s original intent.

Bill 1965 (named, most likely, for the attitudes of that era) was supposed to essentially reverse the Matthew Sheppard and James Byrd Act, a federal law that added sexual orientation to the list of minorities protected from violent hate crimes. While states are not allowed to override federal law, Oklahoma found a strange workaround, mandating that local law officials simply not enforce a specific section of the U.S. Code under Title 18. Due to a clerical error or typo, however, the bill identified that section as 245 (which deals with race and religion) instead of 249 (which deals with sexual orientation).

Now, it’s actually a worthwhile exercise to substitute religion or race for sexual orientation to see how crazy anti-gay arguments sound, but this is the first time I’ve ever seen lawmakers do it themselves… to their own legislation… and actually pass it.

Or who knows, maybe they just wanted to exercise the golden rule and seek to be treated the way they treat others?

Either way, the intent of Bill 1965 is exactly the same, no matter which group of people it applies to. With that in mind, I’m sure the legislators who supported the bill in the first place will see no problem keeping it on the books as it stands, right?

Virginia Forcing Colleges To End Gay Protections

March 10th, 2010

Virginia is for (a restricted subset) of lovers

Ken Cuccinelli II, the Attorney General for the U.S. state of Virginia has formally warned all of the state’s colleges and universities that they must rescind their non-discrimination policies for gays, or face legal consequences.

Well, that’s all kinds of crazy. Surely “non-discrimination policies” is a really just some coded phrase to camouflage what might actually be a more reasonable request, right? Let’s look at Cuccinelli’s letter:

It is my advice that the law and public policy of the Commonwealth of Virginia prohibit a college or university from including “sexual orientation,” “gender identity,” “gender expression,” or like classification as a protected class within its non-discrimination policy absent specific authorization from the General Assembly.

Oh dear.

Yes, it appears that treating everyone equally, regardless of their sexual orientation, is illegal in Virginia. Discrimination with respect to employment and college admission is the letter of the law and, by golly, Cuccinelli is going to enforce it.

The state’s top universities—all of which have such non-discrimination policies—are reacting nervously, declining any official comments. Students, on the other hand, are having no trouble speaking their mind. Even though it’s in the middle of spring break, a Facebook group in support of equal treatment has already popped up with nearly 5,000 members.

Say, Cuccinelli does realize that being straight is a sexual orientation too, right? Hey, maybe this means I could start a gay-only faculty, offering degrees in fabulousness!

Special thanks to Slap reader Chase for alerting me to this craziness!

Ugandan MP Says He Would Kill His Gay Family Members

February 26th, 2010

There was a human rights forum in Kampala late last week, with speakers largely discussing the horrifyingly anti-gay bill currently before parliament in Uganda. Otto Odonga, an MP in said parliament, decided to take the opportunity to declare that he would kill his own son if he ever found out that he were gay.

“There is something deeply wrong with you,” replied Makau Mutua, the forum’s keynote speaker.

And I really have nothing to add to that!

United States To Allow HIV Travellers

November 2nd, 2009

And you must contain less than 100ml of fluid, so you might want to use the washroom.

The United States will soon lift a 22-year old travel ban forbidding HIV-positive people from entering the country, even for vacation. The U.S. was one of only twelve countries to ban HIV travelers, sharing the unique distinction with Armenia, Brunei, Iraq, Libya, Moldova, Oman, Qatar, Russia, Saudi Arabia, South Korea, and Sudan.

This much-needed reversal in policy was actually signed into law by President George W. Bush, but wasn’t fully implemented before the end of his administration.

The policy change, which takes place on January 1st, means that the United States will now finally be eligible to hold the International AIDS Conference, which is great, since Canada isn’t all that interested.

Gay Travel Options Are Limited

October 2nd, 2009

Next time try Escaped Convict Murder Land instead.

Xtra is covering a vacation horror story experienced by a Canadian gay couple this summer. A one day stopover in Dubai turned nightmarish after the couple was targeted for a full security search, then jailed for possessing a bottle of prescription arthritis medication.

Stephen Macleod and Rocky Sharma spent 27 days in an Arab prison, much of it without any contact with each other. Terrifyingly, they were instructed by the Canadian embassy to never hint that they were a couple, as being gay in the United Arab Emirates is punishable by death.

Lucky for them they were eventually declared innocent and released, avoiding the much more dire charge of being gay where it’s not allowed. Speaking of the experience, Sharma told the media “we’ll never go back to that country.”

That’s good advice for everyone. You know, to maybe stay out of countries that want to kill you.

British Government Apologises To A Hero

September 11th, 2009

Better late than never?

British Prime Minister Gordon Brown has officially apologised to Alan Turing, one of my biggest personal inspirations, for the appalling treatment he received from the government before his death in 1954.

OK, it’s not exactly a household name, but I guarantee you’ve used the fruition of his theoretical and practical work.

Turing was a mathematical genius who not only helped break the German Enigma codes (a monumental turning point for the Allies in the Second World War), but who also founded an entirely new field of science—the one in which I hold my M.Sc.

Described by friends and colleagues as an accomplished marathon runner with a shy personality and annoying laugh—Turing was also unapologetically gay in a time where such an existence wrought severe and unjust consequences.

Truly, the list of accomplishments achieved during Turing’s life is matched only by the tragedy surrounding his death. Robbed by an ex-lover, Turing was forced to reveal his personal relationship with the burglar to the police, drawing an immediate conviction under criminal laws barring homosexuality. The agreed punishment was chemical castration via a year’s worth of regular hormonal injections. The hormones permanently changed his physical appearance, including the development of breasts (of which us gay men aren’t particularly fond), but it was the loss of his security clearance with the government that devastated him the most. He died two years later of apparent suicide, a poisoned apple sitting on his bedside.

For me, the sadness of Turing’s life is balanced by its immense personal influence. As I sit here, typing and illustrating on what is still known in academic and mathematical circles as a Universal Turing Machine, I can’t imagine what my life would be like had he never existed. I wonder how he would react to all the joys being unlocked within the branches of science he founded. And what an injustice that I get to study these joys so intimately, while the mind that sparked them had no such opportunity.

It doesn’t make up for history, but the British government’s recognition and apology was the right thing to do. You deserved better, Alan, and recognition of that is spreading.

(And a gentlemanly tip o’ the hat goes to Slap reader Mark from the UK for alerting me to this important development, and for participating in the petition that helped bring it about!)

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